Happy Tears

I've never felt so loved in my life. The warm hug made me cry in front of her. The first thought that came to my mind is how awful and weak I look in front of her right now. Beyond that, I really didn't care a lot because I loved her so much. She looked at my eyes and gently reached with her warm palms, touching and wiping the tears away. She touched my tears of happiness.

Can you imagine how shallow people can be in high school and later life? Teenagers often find themselves hearing / saying the golden three words "I love you" too often that they either believe it and get hurt afterwards, or they just dismiss it because they don't believe it. Then people wonder why high school relationships last less than two months, which eventually makes it like a dating site or just a 'phase' in life. I think it really ruined society this way, but I also think it doesn't effect Zoey and me. We both know what we say and we both know we actually mean when we say it in those precious lovely moments.

It was the first time I've cried tears of happiness in front of her and in fact I find myself doing it more often these days when I do anything with her. It happened first when I was at the Annual Trip this year, a few days ago actually. When everyone left the room I just felt I needed to let her know how much I miss her big love and let her know how awesome she is and how grateful I am for the way she changed my life. She sent me a picture of her blushing, I died from the inside. It was amazing, I hope I made her realize how important she is to me.

I hope I effected her life as great as she did to me, so she'll feel as good as I do. All I want her is to be happy and feel the ultimate joy, every minute of her life - she deserves to be happy. And yes, I am crying from happiness while writing this as well.

A couple

I entered the room and closed the door behind me, I heard the song 'Elder Brother - Throw Me to the Wolves' playing in the background. I was thinking "did she plan this? that's a smooth move then" and smiled. She was standing close to the door, with her long dark hair and gorgeous eyes looking at me. I didn't really plan through the situation, I wrapped my arms around her waist and pressed my lips against hers. While the song was playing in the background we just slowly made our way to the window and continued to kiss passionately. It was like a perfect teen movie with the song in the background. I felt loved and my eyes began to fill with tears of happiness as it continued. I'm totally saving this song as one of 'our' songs!

So me and Zoey decided we're being together, after our 'thing' that has been going on. (Go 21st!) I honestly think it's great because it might mean that she wants me, because she told me "if I'm going to want something, I'm going to need to really want it". I appreciate her decision, I'm continuously thinking about how honored and lucky I am to have her.

The thing that alerted me is that she said "I want to try being together". I hope that during our relationship (and before it) I'll prove (and has proved) that I'm worthy in such way. I really wanted to be with her, she is really someone I can imagine spending a lot of time with. She has endless positive traits, that I was so happy yet surprised she did want to continue it. I'm barely being told "yes" in life anyway. I didn't think I deserve someone as good as her, for my looks, my knowledge and my wishes of love. She accepts me as I accept her. Every time she wraps her arms around me, as she initiates a hug, I'm feeling loved again and again and again. It re-assures me that she loves me no matter what. That's what our friendship was based on first place!

The moment she told me that she trusts me and that she knows that I'm respecting her, there for her no matter what, wanting all the best for her, admiring and respecting her - I was so glad because I've only DREAMED of a girl like her. Dreamed that someone would understand and accept my huge amount of love.

When I look around at the people I've met in my life and the people I know now, she's so different in so many good ways, that I can't imagine being with someone else. No one can imagine what the future has for us, how this thing develops and what is exactly a 'top-reach' point in a relationship is. I think the fact that we are together now, the fact that my heart skips a beat every time I see her and the fact that we love each other so much is the top. Relationships aren't here to progress with them (besides moving in / engagement / family and such), in my opinion, it's like a thing which goes on and on and on. If I'll take it as something to progress with I'll always pursue to do something 'new' or anything that would be done to not be boring. But, I always get excited when I see her and even more excited when she simply hugs or kisses me.

I mean, we don't think of the future now (and we shouldn't) since we're enjoying the moment in our lives. I'm really trying to make her understand that I have the most unbelievable love towards her. 

Have you ever been told something which completely took your breath in a second? Something which you just closed your eyes in shock of happiness that has just struck you? I've heard it from her last night and I took a deep breath once she said it, because I realized I'm the happiest man in the world. Three words which meant a lot for me in a brief two seconds.